BRIXTON, UK – (The Comedy News) – King Ralph, the lazy portly American slob who had a brief stint as King of England in 1991, has announced that he was not invited to the wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton this weekend.
“I’m not really that offended,” explained Ralph, now a bouncer at Morris’ Tavern in Brixton. I never really liked weddings anyways. Except for the food and spirits.”
When asked what the best food he ever had at a wedding, King Ralph replied, “I was invited to Victoria and David Beckham’s wedding. The dessert cart had all-you-can eat spotted dick.”